Ok, so apparently Flavor Flav didn’t event coonery. It has been going on since the 19th Century. The coon manifest itself in a the Amsterdam tradition of celebrating good old Zwarte Piete which translates to “BLACK PETE!”. Now  I know Amsterdam is known for the good weed and abundance of extacy, and I would like to blaim the countless mushrooms consumed by this nation of indulgence. However, I cant let a whole nation of white folks slide by celebrating Black Azz Pete, Santas lil servant coon. This dude look like a long lost member of the Rock Steady Crew. I can decide if he Is gonna throw a magical potion at my feet or break dance. 

How much more fucked up can things get. Look at this coon. He has on a black and gold fit with a matching kangol. The bad thing is I know black folk that would walk out the house with some shit like that. I swear whoever designed this coons outfit spent like 2-3 weeks in Detroit. He prolly got on some solid gold Iron Sheek shoes.

Thats right Zwarte Piet has been described as Santas little helper. Think of him as a elf but he is black as the pit from pole to pole. He helps Santa by literally doing all the dirty work. He is the one that climbs down the chimney and drops the presents off so Santa doesn’t get his pimp suite all dirty. Aint that some shit.

“Revellers in the Netherlands blacken their faces, wear afro wigs and bright red lipstick, and walk the streets throwing candy to passers-by. As at Carnival, some of the actors behave dim-wittedly, or like buffoons, and/or speak mangled Dutch as embodiments of Zwarte Piet.”

It gets worse….

“Jan Schenkman writes Saint Nicholas and his Servant; Piet is described in this book as a servant and as black, not as slave and is depicted as a dark man wearing Asian-style clothes.”

So not only do they have thousands white men dressing up in black face talkin in broken dutch, but the Nationa of Amsterdam attempting with all vigor and will within to make black people sounds like “they want us to”. These same coons are adding more insult to injury by dressing up as yet another stereotype, the “chinaman”. They got us dressed up like chinamen yall! Running round with black face,  wigs, and a fucking satin suits with Chinese shoes. WTF! Africa and Asia aint even close unless, yours truely gets a lil to flirty at China-Wok and offers his dumplings and tangy sauce to the young lady ringing up his General Tso’s chicken. FUCK, by these descriptions Bruce Leroy from the 80’s classic “The Last Dragon” was indeed, ZWART PIETE! What the fuck is the world coming to when pop culture heros of a long gone era are in fact, cloked subliminal imagrey for ancient European coonery.

Get this! The origins of Zwarte Piete are even worse than its current coontastic manifestation. The story has its roots in the belief that Saints often had little evil servants by their sides as souvenirs from their bouts against the devil. Apparently it was believed that “Ole Black Azz Piete” was one such devil that St. Nicholas (Santa) defeated and made his servant. Originally Zwarte Piete was  the bad guy. He was known to be particularly hard on bad children. “Old Black Azz Pete” would throw them into his satchel and and give them coal instead of presents. Aint that some shit.

So basically we have several generations of white folks raised to believe that an evil black man with a curly Afro, dressed like a chinaman, will kidnap you and give you lumps of coal. Wow! What a way to vilify black men.

To wrap this up, I don’t care how good the weed is in Amsterdam. I dont care how much pussy you guy buy for $20 in their Red Light District. Im not fuckin with them or Black Azz Pete.

 p.s.

shot out to my Asian comrades caught in the struggle for racial equality. The “chinamen” reference refers to the asian equivalent of the coon, and not to Asians in general.